Pitching Tents – Camping with Daddy and his friends

Introduction:
I recently turned eighteen, but this is the story about what happened five years ago, during the summer. Those surprising events turned me into the strange girlish boy I am today. Maybe I would have become the person I am nonetheless without that life-altering event and the episodes that followed, or maybe not. Caleb was my name. However, nowadays I go by Caley (or Cassidy) for those who know me – which is a select group of people, consisting mostly of men.

The whole thing started early August, the year I would turn into a teenager. My dad, Benjamin, was going camping with his friends, as he used to do every year. Our household consisted of only the two of us. Mom had passed away when I was young, too young for me to vividly remember her, though there are plenty of pictures of her around to remind us of her. She had been rather pretty. Of slim and petite build, with blonde hair. Scandinavian genes exists on my mother’s side of the family – her own mother, in other words grandma, exhibits these features as well. I think I took after my mother much more than my father. My hair had been blonde before but now had a taint of brown in it, and my small stature hinted clearly at this.

My father’s parents weren’t still with us. I barely ever knew them. I don’t think them and Dad were that close. The grandparents on my mother’s side were (and still are) alive and kicking however, and they live in the same city. Usually, when my dad went away, one or both of my grandparents would come over and babysit me, as if that was really necessary any longer! But, I suppose I liked getting meals prepared.

This time around my grandparent’s would, however, not be able to look after me during the week my dad would rediscover nature (as if it wasn’t discovered enough already?). They had already gone away on some golfing-trip-package-deal. I mean, they were in their 70s – why could they not just stay at home like other old-timers? Despite having suggested that I needed no babysitter, being as good as thirteen years old and all surely meant that I could manage a week on my own! Then again, my dad thought not. Besides, as he was kind enough to remind me of multiple times, some fresh air and less physical inactivity would do me some good. I felt like everything was being stacked against me.

School being out for the summer, I wanted to spend as much time as possible playing PC games with my friends. In all fairness, I never had a lot of friends, but I was fairly close to two other boys. Then again, I had recently been getting the feeling that they were starting to exclude me more and more, even though I had never figured out why. When we were not playing online games, League of Legends or World of Warcraft being what we spent most of our time on, we sometimes played Dungeons and Dragons and other really nerdy stuff.

As you may have guessed by now, we were not part of the popular ones at school – not that D&D and computer games by themselves necessarily indicate a lack of popularity, and screw that whole social status thing anyway. Nevertheless, we were outsiders. Which I suppose was fine by us. At least we were not being bullied, even though the jocks made their jibes every now and then. Sticks and stones. While they were doing sports, and acting fools around girls, we were doing e-sports and dreaming of chasing girls – and them wanting our affection. However, that was unlikely to happen, and although we did not exactly talk about it, I think we all knew that.

Me, Zachary and Jayden (those were my mates) were a diverse little gang as far as appearances go. Jayden was a tall and gangly boy. He was also the one lending some color to our group, being African-American. Zachary, called Zac by most everyone, was not quite as tall as Jayden, though he was considerably heavyset. As for me, I was the shortest and smallest of the bunch. I had hopes of getting taller once my growth spurt started. Perhaps worse for me, or at least equally bad as I felt it, was how skinny I was. Though Jayden kind of looked like a walking scarecrow due to his height, and had been called so by some assholes amongst our peers, I was in fact even thinner if one got a closer look. I had started wondering if their development, because they seemed to be growing at least, and talking of pubic hairs and the such, was a contributing factor to why I felt excluded.

With the feeling of them getting along better and better, and getting hints of them gaming, and going to the movies without me, etcetera, I felt that it was a real bummer having to go away. Partly because I would have to be in the outdoors – which I felt sucked big time – and partly because I would miss out on more things and my friends would possibly create an even tighter bond without me. It was not like I would be doing something cool, something they would want to know about.

So it was, that I was ultimately going away with my stupid dad to go stupidly camping with his stupid friends. Living in a bloody tent, and fishing for bloody fish and probably reluctantly pressured to chime in and attempt to sing some stupid camp songs at evenings while there would be nothing to do but to see the stupid trees stir in the bloody wind and look up at the dumb stars. Everything had been there forever, and would continue to be there after I had gone. I felt like there was nothing remarkable about nature; that was just a saying for stupid people who did not understand technology. Why could I not just be left on my own, to spend time as I wanted to!? Needless to say, I was in a sulky mood, and I made no effort to hide it as my dad drove us to pick up his friends before we headed to a state park.

My dad, approaching his 50s, would usually let me do as I pleased. He and Lee, one of his friends that we were about to link up with, owned a small construction business. By that time, I did not know what the other companion, Reginald, did, but as I found out later he was a strength and conditioning coach at a nearby community college. They had all went to high school together and had played football. They were a tight knit of comrades and had been so for ages. I could not help but to be a little jealous; as it seemed, I would have no such long-lasting friendship in my life.

I had already met Lee dozens of times, but Reginald I had only seen on a couple of occasions. Lee lived closest to us and thus we picked him up first. Last but not least, we picked Reginald up at his apartment complex. He was a big buy. African-American. As I learned during the coming days, he had a twenty-year-old daughter in college. He had been married twice, and twice divorced. Unlike Dad and Reggie, Lee had never tied the knot with anyone.

Upon arriving to our destination, we parked close to some other vehicles – a few cars and an RV – then took our valuables and all the gear and were on our way along a trail. I didn’t carry much, but nonetheless quickly got tired and the backpack felt very heavy, digging into my shoulders. There were a few people around. We met a man and a woman with backpacks similar to ours, and then an older couple who only appeared to be there to walk their dog.

When I was about ready to give up, back aching and legs being tired, we went over some low bushes and left the trail. The footpath that we now traversed was barely visible, and it took us further into the park. I asked how much longer it was until we were there. Evidently it was still some distance to cover. At least we took a break at that point – my dad seemingly noticing my fatigue.

Continuing on, I followed my dad and the others; them evidently knowing the way by heart as it seemed. Dad explained that they had been going there ever since their high school years. We trudged onwards. Onwards and upwards now. At times there was not even a path to follow. Finally, after having crested a hill, we soon came upon a spot next to a small lake. There was a very small clearing, surrounded by big pine and birch trees. A speck of land, next to the water, with grass and a large stump of a felled tree in the center.

While I mostly just dangled my sore feet in the water, they set up camp. At the entrance of each tent, me sharing one with Dad, and Reggie and Lee having their own, hung a mosquito-killing LED lantern. As it would turn out later, possibly due to favorable weather and/or winds, or a combination of both, or even failing populations of the blood-sucking insects, these lanterns barely had any mosquitoes to prey upon. That was at least one of the things that seemed to be going my way.

In the middle of our secluded encampment, a few yards from where land met with water, was the large tree stump. Its surface was smoothed, and it acted as our table. The many roots sprawling out around it made the ground somewhat uneven and treacherous to walk, but our portable camping chairs could manage well enough if proper care was taken to place their legs between these roots. In the middle of this immoveable table, Lee set up another mosquito killing device. “Can’t stand the little fuckers”, he said when I looked at it. Though it would barely get a chance to fulfill its secondary purpose, it was at least sufficient at its primary one; provide illumination.

After a Ready-to-Eat camping meal, of which I could barely get everything down – it tasted well enough mind you, I was just not a big eater – I went to bed early while Dad and his friends sat around talking. I was tired. The sleeping bag was quite comfortable when unzipped, but the tent was a little too hot. I didn’t want to sleep without my sleeping bag either since that made me feel vulnerable – as if an unzipped bag of polyester somehow provided magical protection against the terrors of the wild. Nevertheless, I quickly feel asleep.

The following day I slept late, and found that the others were up and about when I left the tent. We did some angling in the lake during the day. The only one who caught something of note was my father, who got a pike. It made for a good meal. Later in the afternoon, my dad, Lee and Reggie competed in archery. Lee had brought a bow and some arrows. I tried to partake – it did look like fun – but it took too much effort to pull the bowstring. I was disheartened but attempted my best to play it off. Like I wasn’t bothered anyways. Like I had better things to do, and better things on my mind.

When they were done, Lee – with my dad’s permission – let me throw an axe at the large tree that they had used for target earlier. After he had watched a few of my throws, my father walked off, saying: “Be careful. If you hurt yourself, we’re a long way from help”. When we were alone, Lee started giving me some tips on how to improve my stance for better balance and thus better accuracy. He had his hands on my butt and told me to “activate it” and to “squeeze it tight” when I threw the axe. Also, the throwing motion should apparently originate from my hips. I didn’t want to be weird about it, so I didn’t protest when he seemed rather handsy. Neither did I think much of it.

That evening, as we were eating from cans, with a little camp fire ablaze next to us, the others had started talking about someone they had known, not much older than them, that had died from a heart attack. That lead to a chat about working out and exercising. About taking care of oneself. Earlier on, during the day, the others had basically been wearing nothing but shorts. I had observed how Lee was tall and lean with toned musculature across his body. He made me wish for having something similar when I grew up. My dad, not quite as tall but not short either, maybe six foot and one or two inches, had a considerable gut though. To call him overweight did not really suffice. I would rather have been a little overweight myself; then I could stop eating so much and get more of a normal body instead of the skin-and-bone one many had taunted me over for my entire life. Reginald was a really big fellow though. About the same height as my dad, but larger. However, it wasn’t just fat. Sure, his belly was big, but so were his arms, legs and chest muscles. Sort of overweight, but with muscled in there too. He looked properly strong.

My dad was saying “Alright alright, so it’s a long time since I exercised… I just haven’t gotten around to do it”.

“Well, I keep inviting you to come along with me and do some crossfit”, Lee responded with a toned of mixed amusement and exasperation.

That got Reginald going “Pfft! CrossFit! More like CrossFail!”.

“Oh yeah that’s right, Mr. Big Guy over here just wanna do the same old movements at the gym and never mix in any real cardio”, Lee replied. “I think CrossFit is great; maximum effort during short intervals”.

“As long as you don’t start going over your workout of the day, and all those girl names you and your cult have for your workouts”, Reginald answered in good humor.

“Meh! Know what, you should come yourself to one of these girly workouts man, and bring Benjy along. And you’re invited too, of course, Caleb. There’s people of every age there”, Lee said. He also added: “And for the record, speaking of girly things, it is a good enough place to meet women. Single girls, single moms, even married ones!”, he winked at me. He had a fun way about how he said things. I couldn’t help but smile. “How long has it been since any one you got some?”, Lee concluded.

My dad squirmed a little and said “Not gonna talk about that in front of Caleb, man”.

“Meh, lame excuse… But alright, just admit that it’s been a while?”, Lee answered.

“Fair enough, it’s been a while”, Dad said, and then grudgingly he added: “And then some…”.

To me it would have been a luxury to even had had sex at all! I was increasingly curious about it and fantasizing about it. My mind always seemed to find a way to think of it when I saw pretty girls and sexy women. And there and then, thinking about the times I used to be thinking about sex, resulted in me getting a little boner. While Lee was saying: “See! About time you tagged along”, I tried to act normal and not look down to see if there was any indication of my stiffy.

“And how about you, Reggie?”, Lee asked.

“What about me?”, Reginald wondered.

“You’re not exactly drowning in pussy either, are you?”, Lee commented. My dad interjected at this point that Lee should watch his language. I, however, wanted to show that I was not the delicate little boy everyone always thought me to be. I was more or less thirteen, about to be a man – though I hardly looked the part. Therefore, I said “Dad, come on! I’m not a baby”. This made Dad shrug his shoulders and smile, while Reggie raised his beer in salute and Lee exclaimed: “That’s the spirit! Back to you, Regs. Need to use a lifeline? What’ll it be!? 50-50, phone a friend or ask the audience!?”. Lee gestured out towards the empty woods around us. His words echoing across the lake. Reginald, like the rest of us, could not help but to be amused by Lee’s antics. “Let’s just say I’m not celibate, okay?”, he answered.

The conversation on that subject quickly died out thereafter. With the sun having set about an hour ago, we all hit our sleeping pads. The next day, the third one without the comforts of modern day society, was as I had predicted this whole trip to be; achingly dull. I wanted to be at home, playing games online. I did not understand. My dad and his friends seemed perfectly at ease out here in the middle of nowhere. They barely did anything. They drank some beer, took naps in the sunlight, played some cards or Uno and jibber jabbered about old times and the such. We had not seen a single person since we got there. Anyone following the hiking trails would miss us by a mile I figured.

Early in the evening, me and Lee sat around our tree stump table and waited for my dad and Reginald to return with some firewood. “So, gotcha any nice girlfriend?”, Lee asked. I wasn’t really at ease with such questions. Even though I had a crush on several girls at school, it’s not as if they would consider me. Therefore, I just shook my head at Lee and said “No”.

“Really? A fine, young man like yourself”, said Lee. “Or boyfriend maybe? No one is judging any more these days, which is all for the better really”. I do not know what it was exactly, but I decided to share more than I usually did. Maybe it was the way Lee was, saying what was on his mind in a carefree way. I wanted to be more like that. While looking down, I consequently said “I’m too skinny to find a girlfriend”.

“And? Like that’s even a problem dude!”, Lee said. I looked up. What did he mean by that? Of course it was a bloody problem! At this point in time, Dad and Reginald were nearing. Reggie sat down in his chair as Dad arranged the firewood, and Lee continued “You know that being thin is considered attractive these days, right? Haven’t you seen all the models, female and male alike? Slim is sexy, man”.

Dad and Reggie both looked puzzled – having missed the conversation leading up to that reply from Lee – and I was not exactly happy about them probably going to want to be included in the discussion now. But, when they had been caught up quickly by Lee, while I blushed and wished he would have just shut the hell up, Reggie gave me a pat on the shoulder with his big hand and said that “everything will work itself out. Some work and dedication that’s all it takes… More food, and some strength training”. He also said that it would get easier when I hit my growth spurt. Dad offered similar encouragement and proclaimed that we could both start working out; him to slim down, and me to build myself up.

“You gonna stick to that, Benjy?”, Lee said with a twinkle in his eye. Dad, not rising to the skepticism, responded “Well, why the hell not. It’s about time that I start doing something again”. In response to Lee’s jibes, he added “Just been taking a little 25-year break and bulking up, ‘is all”. That got both Lee and Reginald cracking up with laughter.

I was feeling better. More optimistic. Oh, I was still highly dissatisfied with my current self, but I felt hope for the first time in a long time. Hope for change. I could transform myself, damned if I couldn’t! Though I had always pretended to never be bothered when getting teased about my unimpressive, skinny and short body, it had, in fact, always gotten to me. Like an open wound that would never close; constantly ready to be ripped open again when someone felt the need or urge to put me down. The stronger boys used to make a show of how I was not be tackled in sports since I was “about as weak as a kindergarten girl – and one ought to be nice to little girls”. I hated them all. They would see.

And as for my so-called friends, if they were going to keep freezing me out, then I would do the same to them. Screw them! Who needs false friends anyways? I would stop playing D&D and gaming on my computer. I could do this CrossFit thing with Lee, and maybe Reginald could show me a thing or two about lifting weights? At home, I would eat like a wolf. No more being a complete nerd, timidly eating small portions while sitting at his computer! Or, maybe I could just allow myself to game one hour or so every day, no more than that! Instead of being the scrawniest one, whom no one at school respected, I would instead become muscular! Like Lee and Reginald, but more like Lee since I did not want to be fat either.

The next day, my forth without the internet, we were at least about to do something. We were going hiking. Not exactly what I would call enjoyable, but it would be better than to sit around our isolated camp merely ‘enjoying’ nature. After a late breakfast, we brought water, some rations and our valuables, and went back towards the trail that people used for hiking in the area.

Along the route, Lee would, when he was behind me, touch or graze against my butt every now and then. The first couple of times I acted as if I had felt nothing, but when there could be no mistaking it, I turned around. He just smiled at me and asked “Everything good?”. In fear of appearing to be strange myself if I called him out on it, I said nothing. He could have just lost his footing and stumbled into me a few times. He had been kind to me thus far, and he was generally funny – the funniest of us there for sure. So, I just continued walking again to catch up with the other two.

After about an hour or so, we passed a low cliff overlooking a narrow but rapidly flowing river. A couple of hundred yards further there was a rest stop where we decided to take a break. Lee said that he wanted to go back to the cliff and take some photos with his new camera. He asked if I wanted to “tag along”, and maybe I could “offer tech-support if he had need for it – me, as a millennial, presumably being more tech-savvy than him”.

When we reached the cliff, we took some pictures each. It was easily done. Lee then told me to stand there, looking out over the sparkling water while he backed up and snapped some more shots. After he had done that, he encouraged me to moon to the camera. Unsure, I looked around. No one in sight at least. He asked if I was about to be a chicken… Did I dare do it? Well, why not? I pulled down my shorts and wiggled my ass, still in my underwear at least.

“Hah! That’s the stuff right there! Show mother nature”, Lee said. “Psst! Hey.. hey”, he got my attention, “do a proper moon why don’t cha?”. With his hand he motioned that I should pull down my white trunks as well. I shook my head. No way, I thought. “Just for fun”, he said. My stupid so-called friends would probably not accept a dare to moon properly – but no one was asking them, were they? Lee was asking me… The old me, from a few days ago would not have dared – but this was the new me; the one that would give up on shitty friends and go my own way. Therefore, I forced myself to stop hesitating, since that was what my old, boring self would have done, and just pulled down my underwear and displayed my naked butt for the camera.

Lee soon had me walking backwards towards the camera as best I could with my shorts and trunks pulled down. When I could sense that I was getting near him, he approached me and spun me around before I could react or do anything – or cover anything up for that matter. He had leaned down, and grabbed my naked posterior, and whispered to me “You’re awesome, everyone else are probably just jelly. Skinny is sexy. Remember that”.

I was taken aback, but what he said did undeniably please me. It bolstered my non-existent self-confidence. That he had been feeling my exposed behind while saying it was odd. It made me both nervous and excited. Before I could think of anything to do but stand there and feel my face grow red, he had patted me on my naked ass and suggested that we ought to join the others again.

After that respite, we headed back. Late in the afternoon and back at the camp, with an overcast sky, we started playing poker. I had been taking part once earlier when they played and had quickly understood the rules of Texas hold’em. With Reginald having the most poker chips in his stack, Lee was at least the leader in making jests. He had started talking about how nice it would be if some willing hitchhiker girls strolled into our camp, all in heat for some good lovin’. “Yeah, that’s seems oh so likely – them finding this spot first of all, and then being sex-starved nymphomaniacs”, Reginald snorted while Dad smiled and shuffled the cards.

“We could put up a sign at the trail saying four handsome and willing bachelors this way, and then add an arrow”, Lee was musing, “and since the footpath is gone in places, we could tell them to shoot up a flare if finding themselves lost and we’d simply come meet them”.

“A flare? Really?”, Dad said, “you would possible have whatever people there are scattered in this area of the park coming – looking to see if someone were in actual need of aid. Not that there would be that many though”.

“You’re right, of course”, Lee said, “so maybe we should send up a flare ourselves right now!? See what shows up?”. Nodding towards my father, Lee added “I can let you or Reggie have dibs on the prettiest ones… or, maybe we should let Caleb have first pick?”, he winked at me, “out in the woods is as good a place as any to lose your virginity, buddy”. I blushed.

“You have quite a vivid imagination”, Dad said, while Reginald drank some more beer and Lee chuckled and sipped on his whiskey – he had earlier stated that he believed a little hard liquor to be better than beer if one wanted to stay in better shape.

We continued playing poker. Lee was not yet done with his line of thinking, however. “I suppose we would have to keep a closer look on Caleb if we did send up a flash”.

“And why is that then?”, dad asked almost tiredly.

“Well,” Lee said, leaning towards me and speaking in an imitation of a spooky voice, “there’s a lot of people that like a pretty, young thing like you”.

“Oh, come on, lay off with the twisted jokes, Lee”, Dad replied.

“Oh well, ‘scuse me Mr. Sensitive”, Lee said, “since when have you been so touchy-feely? What’s a bit joking around amongst friends?”.

“Man, he’s my son. Could you just dial your… lovely personality down a notch or two”, Dad responded with a feigned sigh.

“Your wish is my command, my liege”, Lee said with a flurry of his hand and leaned forward.

I had not been bothered, of course. I found myself lost in thought about whether or not Lee was actually right, though I didn’t want to risk making a fool of myself and ask them. But if he were, would that mean that I would have a good chance of scoring with some MILF, provided that she was one of those people who liked younger boys? And where would I go about finding such a woman? I wanted to have my computer there, with functioning wifi thank you very much, so I could at least attempt to find out more. Searching for MILFs would probably mostly end up with me hitting pornsites though – not that that was in itself a problem necessarily.

“Remember our old P.E. teacher?”, Reginald was saying, “people were always gossiping about how he was creepy and too handsy with them. Both boys and girls. Never touched me though”.

“Well that’s probably because you always were a big kid – a big, black kid”, Dad said, “he never messed with me either, but I heard complaints. Wonder if someone in our class ever did… something with the old geezer?”.

“Now you’re the one putting nasty pictures in my head! Argh!”, Lee exclaimed, “get ‘em out!”.

“Jokes aside though”, Lee continued, “you guys have seen the articles about some of those good-looking female teachers who slept with their students and were sent to jail for it, right?”. All said yes in varying ways, even I since I knew what he was talking about. “I bet those boys are upset about that! Getting a dream come true and then have it all end because it wasn’t allowed”, Lee said, and looking at me he added, “You know… if this was Japan, you could soon have sex with anyone you wanted”.

Dad, a look of vexation on his face, said “Whatcha talking ‘bout now?”. In defense, Lee answered, “Merely stating what I know to be true – thirteen is the legal age in Japan, assuming it is with consent of course.”

“If you say so”, my dad said, amused more so than annoyed now.

“In Brazil it’s fourteen. In the Nordic countries it’s fifteen”, Lee added.

“Aaaand in our state it’s sixteen – if I’m not mistaken. You gonna try and rally support for changing it and march off to Washington?”, Reginald wondered.

“You’d only embarrass yourself as a perv if you did that”, Dad said.

“Hold your horses, gentlemen! Was just sayin’… Figured that with the delicate sensitivities of yous twos it could be considered pertinent information. And for Caleb it might be relevant for him to know that Japan is the place to be!”.

“Hah, pertinent!? Really? Lee the wordsmith!”, Dad taunted while he and Reggie laughed.

“What!? I can’t be reading books now and then and be all articulate and shit?”, Lee responded, acting upset. “You gonna police my jokes as well as my speech!? Geez, tough crowd”.

That round of poker, I had been the big blind and had gotten an awful hand – which I had quickly folded. When it was my turn to deal, Lee said, “In a little bit more earnestness, I dunno why ya’ll gotta be uptight at all, it’s just us dudes around. And who is really to say that our laws are the most reasonable? Like, Caleb, don’t you feel old enough to decide for yourself?”

“Sure”, I replied. He had a valid point. I ought to be able to decide for myself if some MILF came around, wanting me. No matter how unlikely that seemed, it that made perfectly good sense to me.

“Now, now, enough with the stern looks, Benjy. Imagine being a blossoming youngster, like your boy here, and some hottie, albeit with some miles on her, wanted to shag you but she wouldn’t dare because of some law – and thus you would miss out on something amazing”, Lee said. He was making so much sense that I verbally concurred once again, while Reginald shrugged his huge shoulders and Dad absently nodded, looking lost in thought.

Around sunset, it had started raining and everyone had withdrawn for the night. The rain was smattering hard on the slanted roof of our tent. “You weren’t bothered by Lee joking around, were you?”, Dad asked. “I’ll tell him to stop otherwise – but that’s not necessary, is it? To him it’s all in good humor”. I told him that it was indeed fine and that I wasn’t some little kid any more, and I meant it.

Dad had moved closer, and he was stroking my back with a hand that he had stretched in beneath my unzipped sleeping bag. “Yeah, if you don’t like something, I’m sure you can say so on your own”. His breath smelled noticeably of beer. “Proud of you”, he said, hand sliding over my butt when he said it. “Dad!?”, I asked. He stirred. “Oh, yeah, sorry, I was thinking about something else… from work”, he said flustered and retreated to his side of the tent.

I did not fall asleep right away after that. How could I? It had been weird, had it not? Then again, maybe it was just me and my dad getting closer during these days – we usually did not interact that much at home, me basically sitting at my computer in my room while he watched sports on the television. No need for me to overreact, I had seen guys slap each other on the butt when scoring goals and making touchdowns and all of that in sports. No biggie really. The melody of raindrops on the canvas was highly soothing, and deep sleep eventually found me.

On the fifth day away from home, I still longed for going online, but not as much as I had before. The sun was out again, as it had been almost all week. I was wearing a t-shirt and shorts. I usually preferred to keep my skinny legs hidden in jeans or trousers, but it was too warm for that. On my head, I had a dorky sun hat that Dad had insisted that I wear when the sun was at its brightest.

Dad and Reginald were playing chess. Lee wanted to exercise and challenged me to do pushups and squats. He was giving me praise, saying that I seemed surprisingly strong. I figured he was exaggerating in order to be nice, at least a little bit, but it felt good nonetheless. I wanted to be strong. He encouraged me to keep thinking about having proper form when doing the exercises and used his hands to remind me.

I wanted to hear more about having powerful legs and strong gluteus maximus, so I pressed my behind against his hands when he had them there. “Very good form now”, Lee said with an air of approval. Dad was watching us, and I felt a little self-conscious when he had his eyes on us, but he never said anything.

Me and Lee inevitably worked up a sweat in the blazing sun and therefore took a swim in the lake’s water to cool off. Everything was not normal though. Under the surface, he was touching me, here and there. I knew that it was highly unusual the way Lee was laying his hands on me, the way they lingered in certain places, but I could not help but like it. I enjoyed the attention he gave me, and the whispered compliments he had for my body – which I indeed hated normally – but he seemed to find nothing wrong with. He was cooler than anyone else I knew, and his words and hands were having an appeasing influence on me. Maybe I wasn’t all that unattractive after all?

“You haven’t drowned yet, have you?”, my dad asked as he approached the water.

“Nah, not yet”, Lee answered.

“H-hop in D-dad”, I urged, perhaps too eager to act normal. In fact, both Dad and Reginald hopped in.

Lee made a joke about how bold it was for Reggie to face the perils of the dangerous water.

“Hey asshole, just ‘cause I’m black that don’t mean I can’t swim”, Reginald responded.

“Would never dream of implying that”, Lee said amused. “I’m sure your 300-plus pound body is nicely buoyant”.

“295 actually, so I’d be careful if I was a lightweight like you”, Reginald threatened in good fun.

“Hey, I’m more of a middleweight, at least according to UFC-standards. Around 185”, Lee said.

Their banter about weight bothered me. I did not want anyone asking me what the scale showed when I stepped on it. I tried to make myself scarce – as much as that could be done without exiting the water. Lee and Dad had started discussing how they’d first aim to get him (my father) down to a light heavyweight from the about 250 pounds he was now, to a middleweight himself eventually.

Ultimately, perhaps inevitably, it was my dad who asked what I had weighed the last time I checked. Glumly, cursing myself for not getting out of the lake before he, or the other two, had a chance to ask, I responded “63”. There was no hiding my embarrassment about that low figure. I should be much bigger than that. If only it had been kilograms, and not pounds. That number haunted me, and now all these men knew it. I could have lied but what was the point? The others must have noticed the change in my mood, and seemed to understand the reason for it. “No worries”, Reginald said, “you’ll pack on pounds in no time if you want to”. Dad and Lee offered similar reassurances. “Easily remedied”, Dad said. “It can only go up”, Lee declared. They made me feel a little bit better again. I had heard it said that I order to change, one needed to hit rock bottom. Maybe this was my rock bottom; admitting how puny I was and that I desperately needed to change my habits? At least I had been brave enough to tell them my real number. The old me would not have done that.

When the sun was setting, we played Uno. I was offered some beer from my dad. The others saluted me, saying it was a big step being offered one’s first beer. However, I did not particularly like it at first, but lied and said that it was “alright”, when asked. Judging by their amusement, they could probably see that I was not enjoying it especially. Nevertheless, I was determined to finish my can and kept drinking from it piecemeal.

The need to pee was suddenly pressing, and as I excused myself, Lee tagged along saying he also had to “drain the dragon”. When we were behind the bushes that had been the designated spot to urinate – with a nearby latrine dug and a felled tree there to sit upon when going number two – I went a few extra paces into the woods since I did not think I could relieve myself in his presence. Upon being done and headed back the same way, Lee had right about finished when I happened upon him with his shorts pulled down, shaking his dick around.

I stopped dead in my tracks. It was… mesmerizingly big. I could not stop looking at it. I wondered if mine, which reached slightly more than a couple of inches when erect, would ever get that big in the future. That was when it dawned on me that Lee was semi-erect and evidently getting harder by the second. “You… uhm, wanna touch it?”, he whispered. I realized that I had been caught staring and blushed profusely. But I did want to feel it. As I stopped shaking my head and instead nodded, he moved closer, ushering me back towards and in amongst the trees again, even more out of sight than before.

Nervous, but fascinated, I hesitantly started touching his long, hard limb. His mumbles, sighs and worded approval of what I was doing urged me on, emboldening me. He leaned back against a large tree trunk and showed with his own hands how he wanted me to tug away on his piece – and I did, captivated by both look and feel.

“Hellooo? Where you guys at?”, my dad could be heard calling from nearby. “Shit! Shit!”, Lee cursed quietly. The trance I had been in ended abruptly. As Lee fumbled to tuck away his big thing inside of his clothes, I felt my mind panicking! That was not something I was supposed to have been doing! What if Dad found out? What would he say? What would he think of me?

“O-over here!”, Lee spurted out. “Shhh, say nothing, aight?”, he whispered to me, index finger on his mouth. I nodded in full agreement, of course.

“What’s going on?”, Dad said when he found us. ´

“Your boy here thought he saw a deer when peeing!”, Lee said.

“A deer?”, my dad asked perplexed. “Seems weird it would have gotten this close to camp”. “Maybe it was an extraordinarily curious one?”, Lee suggested. “Oh well, I’m done taking a wizz – best go see that Reggie isn’t looking at my cards”.

Seemed to me that Dad could notice that something was a little off. Perhaps from my crimson face in the dying light of the day, or from the feel of a general tension in the air – I sure as hell felt like there was. I did not want to look at Dad, and therefore perhaps appeared unusually dodgy, but I feared that if I did, then he would possibly deduce that something peculiar had happened. I was quite sure that I had a terrible poker face. As I stumbled off after Lee back to the tree stump table, Dad indeed gave me a strange look but thankfully said nothing more.

Uno was more my game than poker, and I won a few times. More than anyone else, as a matter of fact. That I had finished the can of beer made me even more content. When we ultimately got in the tent, me and my dad, I had at first been afraid that he would ask something. Did he suspect anything? As minutes passed in silence, I felt an increasing amount of relief.

Before I had fallen asleep, I could sense Dad stirring nearby. Moments after, I felt him enter underneath my sleeping bag. It was much too warm to have it zipped up and therefore I used it more like a blanket. He started talking in a low voice, about this and that, and was soon embracing me from behind. It was weird.

“D-dad, what are you doing?”, I asked, trying to sound as normal as possible. “Shhh, there there. Just relaxing with you for a bit. It’s just you and me, you know – and we take care of each other, don’t we?”, he answered, still hushing at me.

I didn’t know what to respond and was unaccustomed with this level of intimacy with my dad, but at least I managed to answer “O-okay”. What soon made it even weirder was that he touched my thing on the outside of my underwear and shortly after that I felt something hard press against my buttocks. I almost gasped. It was Dad’s boner. Dad had a boner and was pushing it against my ass! “Dad??? What… you doing?”, I asked, scared and nervous.

Exhaling on my neck, he mumbled “relax… relax…”. That did not exactly mollify me whatsoever, but as the seconds went on, I remained unmoving in silence. In a sudden urge of anger at myself for thinking that I didn’t dare tell him to stop, I did just that. “Dad… no, NO Daddy… Daddy no… you shouldn’t… we can’t do this”. He, however, did not listen. Squirming around, I tried to get away. It was futile. I hated being this pathetically weak but stopped struggling nonetheless since I was, among the plethora of feelings and emotions that I experienced, embarrassed by how unable I was to nudge my dad away.

“Been watching… you… these past days… so… so fine”, he whispered. “Saw you flaunt… your ass to Lee, with his camera”. My mind was racing.

“He… he dared me to moon for him”, I replied meekly even though I tried to sound confident.

In continued silence, I was getting manhandled by my father. I felt betrayed, he should NOT be doing what he was doing. On the other hand, it did feel good – in a totally-wrong-sort-of-way. I wanted to get away, and then again I wanted it to continue. Was Dad’s dick as big as Lees? What the fuck was wrong with me!? Why would I even think about what Dad had down there? Yet, it was pressing against me, so why wouldn’t I think about it? Should I try to feel it? Erm, nah. No way, José! With Lee it had been out in the open and he had asked me if I wanted to. Dad was not asking me. Best do nothing.

Dad had started to move around more, poking me here and there. Not gonna lie, I kind of liked the feeling, especially as he had been touching the erection I had gotten. It felt natural to start moving my bottom against him, but maybe that was not what he had hoped for because all of sudden he excused himself and quickly left the tent saying he “had to pee again”. It took a couple of minutes before he returned, and he seemed to fall asleep shortly afterwards. For me, it took a while longer.

The last day of our journey into nature started much like the others. Everyone slept as long as they wanted and ate breakfast when they wanted. I was seriously embarrassed around my dad, though he certainly managed to act normal – as if nothing had happened. The others wanted to crown a final winner among them in archery, and I worked out during that time – doing pushups and squats. I would not be a puny, skinny little kid for much longer! I would get strong and show everyone at school not to mess with me and maybe, just maybe, my dick would one day be as big as the one Lee had shown me.

After a late lunch together, Reginald decided to take a nap in his tent. Meanwhile, Dad had decided that there would be no more postponing of workouts for his part either and therefore he and Lee started doing pushups, lunges, squats and crunches. I was already a bit tired from having exercised on my own, but they invited me to join and I figured that the more I worked out, the more buff I would become. Dad was in nowhere near as good a shape as Lee, and he was sweating profusely. To withstand the heat better, he removed all but his underwear.

Lee suggested some corrections in how I was doing squats and like the other day, he got really close behind me and followed my movements while pressing against me. He advised that I might have a more “free range of motion” if I removed my shorts like dad, who had just been watching us from the side. Figuring Lee knew what he was talking about, I pulled them down and stepped out of them. Repeating the movements, I felt that he had been right; it was easier going up and down, and it was more comfortable in the warmth of that day.

“Maybe you wanna spot your boy?”, Lee asked my dad. “Well, why not”, he replied. Different from when Lee had been standing behind me, I now felt Dad’s more voluminous gut against my back, and if Lee brushed up against me every now and then, Dad was almost constantly touching my behind. He did not follow me when I moved down towards the grass, which I could understand since I was so much shorter than he. But he did keep his hands on my backside, and when I moved up I could swear I was sometimes pushing against his groin.

I blushed considerably when I realized he was hard – once again. Realizing this was not normal, I also knew that I was curious. What was really happening? Looking at Lee standing to the side, watching intently, it was not difficult to make out his dick, that I had seen the night before, stretching against the fabric of his boxers, upwards and to the side. When had he stripped down to those?

“That looks about right”, Lee said, “mind if I cut in, Benjy?”.

“Erm, sure, why not”, Dad responded. While they switched places, I caught my breath a little and then started moving up and down again. My thin legs were burning. I tried to keep my knees from going any more forward than my toes and also focused on not allowing my legs to bend inwards, as instructed. Lee was so much taller than me that he had placed himself on his knees, and when I was at the lowest point of my squat I could feel him pressing me backward onto his boner.

“Looks good, right?”, Lee asked. “For sure”, Dad said. I believed I had a pretty good grasp of this compound movement now. As for the other things that were happening and the attention I was getting from them both, I was not quite sure what to make of it. Oh, I knew that it was sexual and that this was not supposed to be happening. I was not so simple-minded that I didn’t understand that. Two men with hard-ons were touching me, and one of them was my father; the other his friend. But I was erect as well – Lee had been touching my private area – even though it was not as visible.

When I expressed my inevitable fatigue, we switched to pushups to work the upper body. Lee had suggested a friendly competition: We both stood on hands and toes, with me underneath him. I could feel his boner press against me – sometimes more forcefully, sometimes only slightly, as we did our pushups. He was able to do more pushups than me. After I was too tired, I sprawled out against the grass while he kept going. It was apparent that he was grinding himself against me for every repetition.

I had expelled the notion of asking them to stop. Besides, only a minor part of me wanted that, and it was the part of me that was ashamed of my scrawny body, the part that wanted to hide away from the world in my room and only play computer games and wish I popular. Now I was doing something that maybe no one else in my class had been doing – adult things with adult people. Or, maybe a few had in secret – as much of a secret as this was going to be. No way that I would tell anyone that I had felt Dad’s boner against me, or that I had gone so far as to actually touch his friend’s anaconda out in the open.

Dad traded places with his buddy, saying that “since he was not as fit, maybe it would make for a fairer competition”. This time I was pressed to the ground a few times even before I was too tired to go on any longer, and felt Dad forcibly grind against me before he stopped and let us both do more repetitions.

With Reginald still slumbering out of sight, the three of us ended the workout and went into the water. Sunlight reflected on the calm surface, only minor ripples from the wind traveling across the small lake. We started playing around. Among other things, we competed in who could hold his breath the longest (which was Lee). They took turns carrying me on their shoulders. My white trunks were, of course, soaked through and at first, I felt very aware of how my thing could be seen rather visibly. But they did not seem to care, which made me regard it as a non-issue.

Then, they attempted to balance me on their hands, holding me above water. Not a few times during our playing around had both Dad and Lee put my hands on their boners and also grabbed my ass and squeezed it. “Skinny-dip?”, Dad asked both me and Lee with a warm smile. Being in unusually good spirits, I said “Mkay!”, and Lee answered, “Good idea”. Following Dad’s example, we bundled up our underwear and threw them up onto the grass.

Not long afterwards, Dad and Lee were swimming close to me. Their hard things had been nudging and prodding against me under the water. At Dad’s encouragement, I soon found myself clutching onto and feeling his cock beneath the surface. It felt… Nice. It was very hard, and so much bigger than mine. “Y-you like it?”, Dad struggled to ask. “Mhm”, I replied, not bothering to hide my fascination.

In order to give me footing, Dad ushered me closer to land. When I could stand with my head above the water, Dad’s dick had broken the surface and was in full display. Lee had not been late to follow us. “And what about this one?”, he asked as he was near. I found myself comparing not only the look but the feel of both of them with my hands. My dad’s dick was not as impressively long as Lee’s, but he had just as many veins and it felt equally sturdy – if that was something you could call it without sounding stupid. Since I was his son, would that imply that I could get equally big downstairs when I was older? I hoped so.

Dad reached down and reciprocated by starting to jack me off under the water. “What have we here?”, he asked. Lee also wanted to have a feel and offered similar compliments. They had a pretend-argument of who was going to get the honor of handling my “awesome willy”. This must be one of those circle-jerks I had heard others joke about, I thought to myself amused.

My dad suggested that we should take the party even further away from the “napping big fellow”, unless we wanted him to come out of, and walk around, his tent only to stumble upon us having fun without him. Dad fetched our underwear, and then we swam in near silence a bit further away. Dad held my hand as he led me up from the water beyond the point where he had seen me and Lee the night before, and precariously we found our footing on the slippery stones where the forest met with the lake.

As we walked no more than a couple of yards in amongst the trees, my eyes darted from my dad’s swaying dick to Lee’s. They really were in another league than mine. When we stopped, I did not even need encouragement to start touching them again – it just felt like what ought to be done. I tried to gauge the strength of their tools as best I could, and they surely seemed to like it. Their moans where interlaced with keen words of approval.

“Maybe you should… try kissing Daddy’s… unit”, Lee said. I nodded. I could give it a try. Letting go of Lee’s shaft, I placed both hand on my dad’s rod and proceeded to put my lips on it, and then – with Dad’s eager approval – wrap them around his bell-end. It did not taste of anything really. I was not an easy task at all to fit my mouth over it. Dad winced once and told me to mind my teeth. It was more difficult than I had first imagined. Feeling like my jaw would unhinge and my lips could not be parted any more, I gave up on trying to take much of it in my mouth. Dad became even more vocally approving when I settled for sliding my lips back and forth over as much of his tip as I could safely handle.

Several things then happened at once; Dad grabbed his dick with one hand, and the back of my head with the other; he started twitching and groaning, and though I understood what was happening his sperm still took me by surprise when it shot into my still dick-kissing-mouth. There was a lot of jizz. I did not try to swallow it, but instead let it flow out of my mouth, along my chin and downwards. It tasted… a little sour, but the texture was way worse. Thick and gooey, almost like mayonnaise.

Dad slumped down against a tree. My task was not done however; Lee was no longer standing but instead sat on his knees in front of me. He obviously expected the same attention as Dad, and he would get it. Dad had liked my blowjob, and I wanted Lee to do the same. I went to work on his even bigger thing.

The best way seemed obvious to me; just focus on the tip, any more would be too much and I would hit my teeth against him which would bring pain instead of the enjoyment he was now obviously experiencing from the sound of it. When maybe a minute or two had passed of me standing on all fours, doing my best to suck away on that captivating organ that Lee had between his legs, Daddy surprised me by starting to caress my posterior.

Not needing to look back, I could feel that he had both hands on my hips, not that I had any though, and was playing around with his dick in my “sexy ass”, as he called it. That made me feel even naughtier, if that was possible. My dad was hard again, and it was because of me, because of how he liked the way I looked. It was not normal – nothing about this was – but it gladdened and electrified me nonetheless.

Pleasure followed as Dad had started jerking me off. I had lost some of my focus on Lee, but he did not seem to have minded. If anything, he seemed even more worked up. With a force equaling that of my daddy a few minutes before, he too shot his load into and around my mouth. His semen tasted better on the tongue – it was… sweeter than my dad’s. Not that I said such silly things out loud.

Lee laid down on his back, breathing deeply. Dad had stopped moving his dick about in my behind, though it was still parked there. Instead, he seemed fully focused on giving me a handjob. I stayed on my knees, but leaned down on my elbows instead of my hands, resting my forehead on the ground. This… This was all so… so lewd and, for the lack of a better word, naughty. It felt so good. So what if it was my father? Sure, that made it even more wrong – even dirtier. But was that necessarily a bad thing? Point was that I felt safe, and that I felt such satisfaction! Thrusting back and forth into his hand, I ejaculated. My load was nowhere near as impressive as the men’s, but I had at least been able to shoot out seed of my own. The first time I had done that was some months ago when looking at porn and playing with myself in my room. The experience right now had been much, much more intense though.

It took some moments for us to gather our composure, naked there in the woods. As we made our way back into the lake, I liked that they were still interested in me. Touching me and caressing my body. They were somewhere between sporting wood and being flaccid. There was nothing flaccid about me though; my little soldier was pointing towards to sun. As we swam back, Lee whispered, “best not talk about this in front of Regs just yet”. I nodded, he would certainly think it weird. “Best not mention it to anyone, right Caleb?”, Dad said, “Me and Lee could get in a lot of trouble over something like that”. I knew that that was true, and of course I would not mention it, ever, to anyone, which I told him. I could not have people knowing what had just happened! What I had just done.

Reggie was still dozing off in his tent when we came back, having put our wet underwear on and hurriedly gotten more properly dressed. For dinner, we yet again had canned food – which I was bored of and therefore ate sparingly. This stood in contrast to my devotion of changing lifestyle and bulking up, but every other meal I ever ate henceforth, I promised myself, would be substantial.

With the sun coming ever lower on the sky, they let me choose between Texas hold’em poker or Uno. I picked the latter since I considered myself comparatively better at it and it was more high paced as well as more fun. Dad had proclaimed that since it was the last night of my first real camping trip, I could have as much booze as I wanted. Although I did not particularly like the taste, I wanted to be manly and therefore kept sipping away.

Dad suggested that we should up the stakes by playing strip-Uno; the winner would get to choose who would lose an item of clothing, therefore making winning more important if one wanted to “protect delicate areas against mosquitoes”. He was joking around when he said that, since we had no trouble with mosquitoes – those very few that were around were drawn to and terminated by our lanterns. But his suggestion had been for real, and though Reggie did not appear to see the fun nor the point of it, he was quickly bullied into it by Dad and Lee. It had not helped that I followed the peer pressure and thus was on their side, making it three against one.

To make the game even, we all started with the same amount of clothing: Baseball caps, socks, underwear, shorts, t-shirts. Every now and then I won a round, and to get back at Dad and Lee – who had been choosing that I strip – I picked either of them whenever I got to decide. I was the first one who only had underwear as a singular item left on me. By then the sun had set and the light was disappearing, replaced by darkness that was creeping in around us and the few lights of our camp. At this point I also seemed to have grown numb to the taste of beer; it no longer bothered me as much. Additionally, I had been drinking coke that Lee had “flavored”, as he called it, with “some real drink”.

When Reginald had lost nothing but his hat and socks, my dad and Lee were tied in second place with underwear and t-shirts still on. Dad had won the most recent round, however, and it was his turn to choose. “Sorry son, we’ve been teaming up on you a little… but that’s because it’s always best to knock out the best player first – if you wanna win”, he said, “that being said, I pick you again… but you can keep your boxers on and instead lose your chair. That’s fair right?”. Without waiting for an answer, and seemingly without expecting one, he added “And I elect that Lee has to make room for you to sit with him”.

I took no offense. In fact, I saw it as a sign of respect that they thought I might have won in the end and therefore eliminated me first. I wasn’t usually considered the MVP at anything. Since that was what had just happened, I was out of the game though, right? That did vex me somewhat. I asked if that was the case, but thankfully Dad argued that I could keep partaking in the game if I wanted.

As I lifted away my lightweight, foldable chair, Lee said, “Yeah! Shake that fine ass on over here” and tapped his lap.

“Maybe… maybe it’s time for Caleb to hit the sack?”, Reggie wondered.

“I don’t wanna go to bed”, I interjected, sitting down with Lee.

“See, no need to be a killjoy”, Lee said, looking at Reggie. Dad said nothing.

The game continued. I had already peed once, but now I really needed to go again. The need was so dire that I forgot to say “Uno”, when I had only one card left, and therefore I had to pick up two penalty cards. That resulted in Reginald, who didn’t seem in as good of a mood as the rest of us, winning the round instead, and dad ended up sitting in only his trunks. It became a collective break where we all went our own way and took a wizz.

Back at the tree stump, I had to wait until Lee returned so I could hop up in his lap. When I eventually did, he pulled me back closer to his warmth. He ended up winning that round, and I was actually thankful that he picked me to lose my last piece of garment; my head was dizzy and it had become difficult for me to follow the game properly, and so I was thankful to be out of contention for good. With no chair of my own, and no clothes, I could be a spectator and see who finally won.

At first, I was a little embarrassed about being naked. Naked and in Lee’s lap. Therefore, I covered up my boyhood. On several occasions though, I found myself not protecting my downstairs region. Instead, my arms were at my sides or holding a drink. At these brief moments of clarity, I quickly shielded my nakedness and felt ashamed.

Gradually though, I stopped bothering. Lee had moved my hands out of the way a few times, me meekly letting him without protesting, and only good words flowed silently from his lips into my ears. I felt sort of carefree. Dad and Lee had already seen me naked and we had… done stuff. Besides, I wasn’t about to be a sore loser. Nobody liked a sore loser.

Although, I was a little bothered to have Reginald sitting opposite and seeing me nude in Lee’s lap. Upon me first getting fully nude, Reggie had said, “Maybe that’s enough?”, and when Dad just shrugged, he had added, “it’s getting late, perhaps the lad should retire into your tent for the night? Huh?”. Again, Dad had just shrugged his shoulders and said that it was up to me. I elected to stay. What fun would there be trying to fall asleep in the tent?

There was no hiding that I was getting excited again, not from myself or anyone else. Especially since Lee was moving me back and forth in his lap so that my butt and lower back kept hitting his erection, which must have been struggling to be contained inside his underwear. This affection from Lee had indeed gotten me going. I was stiff myself, and even though there was not much light, they could most certainly see it, if only faintly, in the glow from the lamp on the tree stump. Looking at Dad, I noticed that he was hard inside his underwear. There was no hiding that. I could also see Reginald shuffle about with a hand inside his shorts before the hand emerged again. “Are we… you sure this is… alright?”, Reggie stutteringly asked my dad.

“What happens here, stays here… No harm, no foul”, Dad answered, still looking at me and Lee.

The next round of Uno, Dad won. “I nominate that you lose your shorts, Regs, and Caleb gets to sit in your lap”, he said. That made me a little hesitant. Reggie did not seem to be enjoying himself like us others were. Did he not like me? Maybe Dad and Lee were the only ones who did. Maybe it was because I was white and he was black?

“Nah, I don’t know”, Reggie said, “he can… he can have his own damn chair back”.

“Oh, come on! Don’t tell me a nice and tight little ass don’t get you goin’?”, Lee said as if frustrated, and moved a hand down to my ass. I craned my head backwards, and he winked at me.

“When it’s more… age appropriate maybe… on a girl!”, Reggie spurted out.

“A nice young ass is a nice young ass”, Lee responded hands raised, “and age appropriate? So… you’ve never thought about going for some teenage hottie?”

“Maybe a few times”, Reggie admitted.

“Come on… You’ve wanted a little black-on-young-white, right?”, Lee wondered.

“Not like this… not like this”, Reginald said as if in a prayer.

I had been standing up, naked as I was, about to go over to Reginald but remained un-moving in hesitation since he did not seem to want me there. I had started to feel uncomfortable, and moved to sit back down with Lee again – where I knew I was wanted.

Before I had sat down, Reggie asked my dad if he was “truly good with all this?”.

“Oh! for fucks sakes”, Dad said, “Caley… come to me if Reggie doesn’t dare it”. With a smooth motion my dad pulled down his underwear – without anyone even having won a round and asked him to undress – and therefore he was as naked me when I sat down with him. His thing was pointing upward, almost angrily towards the darkened sky. As I sat on his thighs, my back sometimes graced against, well you-know-what.

Dad quickly became bolder than Lee had been. He was running his hands all over me, spreading my legs apart and touching me downstairs a few times. He called me gorgeous. Lee held us in his gaze and called me sexy. Reggie said nothing, but I could feel his eyes on us. Observing. Judging? Dad raised my arms up, and I clasped them behind his head. I felt even more exposed like that, but I did not mind. I did, however, not really appreciate it when he ran his hands over my flat belly and then my ribs – which were more visible when I had been sitting like that, arms raised and torso bent backwards. In response, I took my arms down, to sort of cover up this display of my unnormal slenderness. My mind was sluggish, so it took me a few moments to realize that being naked sort of put me on full view anyways and I should just keep enjoying this feeling of importance and the empowering proofs of lust towards me.

Snapping me out of my own thoughts, was Dad’s whispers about “the sweet ass I had”. Having him bolster my courage and confidence, since I could feel his sincerity and the evidence of it behind me, I threw inhibition to the wind. I reached back one of my hands and clasped onto the warm and hard thing that had, in a way, made me a little more than a decade ago. Between moans and exclamations about how good I was, Dad was grinding, with two strong hands on the sides of my narrow belly, the crack of my ass back and forth against the base of his penis.

“He’s effin perfect, isn’t he?”, Lee said. He had shuffled down his underwear and was stroking his unit whilst commending me. His praise earned him a smile. Having let go of me, and gently stopping my little hand from working on his manhood, Dad said “he sure is!”. Whispering into my ear, he added “you’re great. I want more, but I should calm down for now”.

“Whaddoya think, should the others get to… experience you a bit as well?”, Dad asked me mischievously. Both Lee and Reginald were looking at me. Lee smiling and winking while holding his big unit. Reggie had an almost unreadable, albeit focused, expression – and though still clothed, he had a hand on his crotch.

Talking to Reginald, my father added “Life’s too short man… Best not turn down a good thing when it’s right there for your taking”.

“Maybe… maybe you’re right”, Reggie said, his hand now rubbing his nether region.

Shaking his head as if in disbelief, Lee said, “Still not sold? Still!? Ain’t gonna be no judgments passed around here. I think that’s obvious and at this point you’re either in or out, and if you’re out… this is… not to be spoken of to anyone else.”

Reggie’s expression darkened as he responded “I ain’t no snitch!”. Earnestly, Lee apologized, stating that they went back too long for him to question his friendship or loyalty.

Dad scooched me of his lap so that I was standing on my own two feet again. “You decide”, he said. My head was fuzzy and my vision fairly blurry. Everything was spinning. Even though it was strange to feel like this, it was a good kind of feeling. I was drunk, I was horny, and I felt like the sexiest young man within thousands of miles. This new sort of attention – a forbidden one I knew – mixed with the praise and the compliments that Lee and my dad were providing me, made me feel… Like someone else. Someone who was happy and daring.

I looked at Reggie. I did not want to go over and sit down with him, naked as I was, if he did not want me to, or did not like me. He, in turn, looked at me, up and down, but said nothing. We were all having fun except for him, I thought.

“While we wait for Regs to admit he’s aboard – come on big guy embrace what’s happening! – I sure as hell want an up-close look at you again!”, Lee said. Moving unsteadily over to him, I was baffled and yet amused of how difficult it had become just to walk normally. The beer and the hard liquor-spiked coke sure had affecting my mind as well as my motor skills significantly. Steadying myself on the tree stump made the few steps an easier task.

Before I could sit down with him, Lee intercepted me while I was on my feet and turned me around so that my hands rested on the natural table. “I think someone’s a little tipsy, ey?”, he mused. His hands were all over me. Caressing my ass and playing with my pecker. After he had been grabbing my posterior quite firmly he turned me around so that I was facing him, or rather his engorged thing which was in front of my now slightly flustered face.

With a hand he pushed it downwards, towards me, and said “How about it? A sweet kiss from a pretty lass?”. He got one. When he continued pressing it against my lips, I gave way and allowed him to enter my mouth. “Oh… oh, yeah!”, he exclaimed. “Addaboy!”, Dad encouraged. At first, I was so momentarily stupid that I forgot to breathe through my nose. It was a struggle to keep my jaw opened wide enough, but I did not want to disappoint so I diligently kept at it, trying to keep my teeth away and my tongue moving.

Finally, Lee retracted his elongated limb and started tugging on himself frantically with his right hand while he ushered me down on my back on the tree stump. Lying there, on top of plenty of the Uno playing cards that were all still spread out, Lee placed himself between my sprawled, skinny legs and ejaculated all over me. His semen ended up from my slender neck down to my own erect boyhood.

With a heavy sigh, Lee sat down in his chair. As I regained my breath, I also made a failed attempt to slow down the world that was spinning around me. “What a trooper”, Dad said. In the corner of my eye, I caught movement. It was Reginald. He had stood up, removed his t-shirt and then started to wipe my body dry with it. “Wanna… sit with me a bit?”, he asked. “If you want to, that is”, he added. “That’s the spirit! Live a little”, Lee proclaimed.

Nodding, I joined the big guy and cozied up in his lap. He placed his large, black hands on my slender, white legs. Not that it was true, but it felt like he could encircle my thighs with one hand. Both Lee and Dad had gone to take a leak. “Hey, you cold?”, Reginald asked me. I shrugged and said “a little”. I had begun to perspire slightly before and as it was evaporating on my skin now, it had indeed become chilly.

When the others returned, evidently in good spirits, both naked and semi-erect, my father fetched me one of his sweaters – which I drowned in, one bony shoulder about to peek out of the neck hole. “Hey Caley, why don’t you see if you can persuade good ol’ Regs here to at least take his shorts off”, Dad suggested. I looked back towards Reginald. Dad had a point. Here I was, naked from my waist down in his lap and I felt his bulge underneath me. He couldn’t be completely uninterested. I had wiggled against it a few times already, but now set to work on moving over it intently, back and forth, continuously. His groans and counterthrusts were all the encouragement I needed to know that I should keep at it.

Reginald inserted his right hand underneath my way too large sweater. It moved down from my flat chest to my privates, where he could get a gentle grip on both my pole and stones. Eventually, he stated that it “was time”, and seemingly without effort lifted me up and onto my feet in front of him while he removed both shorts and underwear. Out of curiosity, I couldn’t help but to look back over my shoulder. It was big. Bigger than Lee’s? I could not tell from a quick glance.

“You got some catching up to do though, randy Regs”, Dad said, “why don’t the two of you enjoy some privacy? To help get things going?”. Reginald gestured towards his tent and Dad nodded. “You up for it?”, Reggie asked me almost hungrily as it seemed. I was up for anything that they wanted, though I merely nodded instead of saying that out loud.

Having been led into his tent on very unsteady feet, where he partly closed the front flap after removing my sweater, I was staring at his thing that he presented to me while we both sat on our knees. I liked what it represented; he was keen on me even though it had seemed like he hadn’t been before. Up close to it, I gathered that it was about as big as Lee’s. Maybe not quite as large, but it seemed a little bigger than my dad’s. It was as black as the rest of Reginald. Unlike daddy’s, the tip of it was not especially larger than the rest; the shaft sort of progressed into the head of it naturally, whereas on my dad I knew by now that his tip was a little bigger than the shaft. In this respect, it resembled Lee’s more. But, where Lee’s member seemed more or less straight, this black one – with its slightly brighter foreskin, more brownish I supposed – had a pronounced curve to it. It bent towards his left.

Leaning closer to it, I gave it a few tentative kisses – which generated moans and fervent encouragement for more – and feeling like I knew my stuff, I went to work on it. It did not taste like chocolate, as I had hoped, but neither did it taste bad. It did not really taste like anything.

“So… goood… so, so good”, he moaned through deep exhales. After what couldn’t have been more than a minute, he pulled out. Expecting him to shoot some warm streams over me, I was surprised when he hastily arranged several items of clothing on top of his headrest and then firmly laid me down on my back on his sleeping mat, with my head propped up. Placing himself on his knees above my flat upper body, one leg on either side of me, he moved in closer. Feeling somewhat pinned, I understood that my task had not changed – I was to continue giving him head.

At first, my arms lay to my sides as I bobbed back and forth as diligently as I could manage, but Reginald soon had them both placed on his black rod and had me move them as best I could while pleasuring him orally. “Oh… oh, you’re too… too damn much boi!”, Reggie moaned. As he withdrew himself, I had my eyes firmly shut figuring I would get blasted from up close. Therefore, I was again surprised when he instead dragged me off the elevated headrest and turned me on my belly.

With his body dwarfing mine as he laid down on top of me, his hard dick immediately began to fanatically peck and prod against my butt and inside between my cheeks. I panicked momentarily, thinking I was about to truly get fucked then and there by someone who outweighed me more than four times. Someone I really would not be able to budge should I want or need to. This only lasted a few moments, thankfully, before I could feel, even through the general numbness and the sluggishness of my intoxication, him sploosh all over my ass.

We laid there for several moments longer though. Me pinned beneath the large man as he slowly kept thrusting his softening thing on me and praising me “little ass”, with several apologies mixed in.

“I’m almost jealous”, I heard Dad saying. Reggie rolled off in a haste, and I turned my head to look over my shoulder so that I could see my father at the tent’s opening. I had become so tired. Straining my neck to look backwards like that was too much effort for me, and thus I merely laid my head down on the sleeping mat and closed my eyes.

“I didn’t… really… fuck him”, Reggie was spluttering out apologetically. “I know… I know”, Dad said calmly. “Couldn’t help but to watch a little”. Lying there, naked with another man’s sperm on me while I knew that my father most probably could see that reasonably well from the lamp hanging at the entrance of the tent, I wasn’t even embarrassed. I trusted that this was what they wanted and that I was not in the wrong.

“Now I do think it’s time for a daddy’s privilege”, I heard my father say. After Reginald had scuttled out of his own tent, Daddy entered and I could feel his hands on my butt. “My, my… it’s a slippery mess down here, isn’t it? Kinda lubed up nicely though”. I didn’t know if it was a question or not, and just mumbled affirmatively in reply. I was so weary. I figured that if he wanted me to do something specifically he would ask, otherwise I’d just lie there and rest a little.

“Don’t be alarmed”, he said. He was sliding his manhood up and down between my buttcheeks. That much was evident. “Such a perfect little ass… why haven’t we done this before!?”, he was saying. I sensed a pressure against something inside of my ass. It was ever increasing. As I was undeniably being entered, I started to protest due to the pain. Daddy stopped pushing inwards and offered encouragement, saying how I was the “best ever”, and that I only had to “endure a little bit more, for Daddy’s sake”.

“Daddy has to feel your… tight little… can’t… can’t be helped”, he mumbled. I may have whimpered and tossed underneath him, but I did my best to bear it as he slowly but surely entered me. Fractions of an inch became an inch, then maybe two. Before long, the man who had sired me was now using me. Shoving his dick back and forth inside of me, there was pain – for sure – but more than that, it had also started to feel like I was going to come without even touching myself. Like I was almost being made, from the inside, to forcibly climax.

These new feelings of pleasure had me trying to hump him back, and now Daddy wasn’t the only one moaning from enjoyment. The anguish in my sodomized posterior was constant and unrelenting, though through becoming more numb or merely more capable of tolerating the hurting, it felt easier for each and every second that passed. Besides, I was not to disappoint my dad. Not now. I could take it. The old me could not have, but the new me could. I was having sex like a grown up.

Leaning down close to my ear, his panting became almost deafening, as he whispered “you like daddydick, dontcha?”. I merely mumbled in reply, confirming that this was sort of how it was. While he called me his “sexy, little breeding mare”, Daddy jizzed in me.

I had no idea how long it took for him stop being on top of me. All I know is that I, with semen running out of me and down the inside of my wobbly legs, had eventually gone out (naked) after my dad, in the haze that was my mind, for a pee. I noticed that Lee was walking with me. I walked up to the lake, it’s surface seemingly black in the night, and peed into the water. Lee had a hand on my shoulder, since he said I “looked in need of support”.

In the lush grass behind the semi-circle of the three tents, Lee stopped me and wanted to have a “quickie” as he called it. Submissively and without objection, I found myself placed on all fours, being penetrated from behind. The pain was there again, but so was the pleasure. My pecker was hard as a rock. “Aw… yeah… tightest… ever”, Lee moaned behind me. “Good thing… you… warmed up… for me”.

With his hands on my non-existent hips he was dragging me back and forth, spearing me on his boner. Having previously seen and felt how big it was, I had no illusions that all of it was inside me at any given time. I figured that maybe, just maybe, I was taking on something that could have approached half of it, if that, on the most painful thrusts. I realized that the hurting was no more so than from having intercourse with Dad, and it dawned on me that they probably had essentially the same thickness. Thinking about my own eager stick, I would be very proud the day – if that day ever came – when it resembled those of these men.

After his tempo had increased, it did not take long until yet again a grown man was shooting his load in me. When he was done, I rolled onto my side in the grass. I was exhausted. Fundamentally spent. Lee hauled me up and guided me back to the others, not that it was a long walk. When Dad saw us, him and Reginald with towels around their waists, he said “and what have we here?”. “Oh, he merely showed me what a good shag he is”, Lee answered, and bent down to squeeze my ass while prompting me to high-five him.

Smiling, Dad said “is that so? You do look tired Caley… but you don’t wanna go to bed already, do you?”. He was right on both accounts. I was fatigued, both mentally and physically. As we entered the center of our campsite, I realized that more so than sleep, I still craved their attention. Their unending attention. Daddy and Reginald’s towels were quickly dropped, and it seemed like everywhere there was a hard cock for me to tug on. Two white and one black one.

The tree stump had been cleared off and a gray blanket had been placed on top of its already smooth surface. Lying on my back atop this blanket, with my skinny legs held up in the air, Reginald wasted no time before he started to penetrate me. Despite the pain, the gratification and horniness prevailed. The hungry dicks that wanted me. So much of me – and they could have it. My mind and body had gone numb. But through the daze I knew I was still getting fucked. How had I ended up outside? Oh yeah, I had needed to pee.

Looking down, I could see my boyhood standing up at attention, pressed against my belly, and beneath it, a black manhood gliding back and forth into me. It was mesmerizing, and it looked sexy in a way. Though the pain was ever present, it was within limits – a scared little boy could not have endured it, but a brave young man, like I was about to be, could. Better yet, the pleasure was ever on the rise. That I enjoyed both the feel and the look of witnessing how underneath my own little erect dick a much bigger one was exploring my straining ass, was that proof that I was gay? Tossing my head and not even caring to attempt to suppress my moans, I didn’t bother thinking about that any further there and then.

To my left I had my father, and to my right stood Lee. Both looking down on me with erections of their own. In the corner off my eye, I noticed how Dad walked away only to return shortly after with his phone in his hand. “Aw, shit! Good idea!”, Lee said and soon had his own cellular device in one hand. “Yeah, well, too dark”, Dad said. “Then let there be light”, Lee answered and held up the lantern that had been moved from the tree stump. Too much had already transpired for me to be exceptionally bothered about being filmed while I was fucking a burly black man. What bothered me most was the prospect of looking stupid and inexperienced on camera, or if I was looking scared, nervous or frail. I did not want to be any of those things!

Thankfully, these concerns of mine were eased from what was being spoken. Evidently it looked “hot” and “perfect”! Feeling like a mix between a rock- and a porn-star, I did not mind it when proffered dicks from the bystanders to try and please as best I could with my hands, while Reginald continued going about his business between my tiny, spread apart legs. If they wanted to film all of this, then so be it. I was, apparently, wickedly good at these sorts of things anyways.

Reginald eventually let go of my legs, leaned in closer and put his hands around my abdomen, seemingly able to almost grip around my belly completely. Resting on my upper back and neck, my legs were dangling about in the air before I did my best to clasp them onto Reggie’s sides. He seemed to have increased his fervor, going deeper than earlier.

“It’s the best ever, huh? Fucking my ‘lil prom queen?”, Dad was saying.

“Uh-huh!”, Reginald rumbled in response. Dad leaned in and tilted my head to the side, pushing his manhood in between my lips. I was starting to feel used up, though at this point in time my body felt as numb as my head.

In a surprising move, Reginald pulled out, lowered me down carefully on my back, and then sat down next to me. Was he as tired as I was? But he hadn’t finished, had he? Surely he would want to finish? Looking up, I saw that his thing seemed as rigid as ever. It appeared to be wet and gleaming, but I could not recollect him climaxing in me.

These mere moments of confusion ended when he, with upper body slightly leaned backwards on outstretched arms behind him, urged me to straddle him. Doing as instructed, I sort of hugged him, my arms around his thick neck, and placed my skinny legs on each side of him. Without looking back, I knew I was hovering above his dark unit.

Lee and Dad seemed very thrilled by what was happening. “Ooooooooh yeah! Fuck yeah!”, Lee bawled. “Do it! Do it!”, Dad insisted. There wasn’t much ambiguity in my lethargic mind about what “it” meant. I tried to lower myself downwards and onto the awaiting phallus. However, it was poking against my right buttcheek, bent as it was. “Guide it sweetness”, Reggie encouraged, still leaned backwards on both his hands.

With one around his neck for support, I put the other behind me and grasped onto his awaiting, throbbing pole. I steered it against my entrance and when everything was lined up I proceeded to slowly, through agony mixed with feelings of bliss, mount the tip of his spear. As seconds of slow movement from both me and Reginald turned into maybe a minute or two, I was riding him. He fucked me and as much as I could endure it, I fucked him right back. What Dad and Lee were saying behind me became true background noise. I believed that “boywhore” was part of their ramblings, which was hurtful to some extent since I considered that the first derogatory things I’ve heard thus far. I quickly forgot about it thought, as everything else seemed flattering and complimentary, and I was busy getting my sex on.

Overweight, yet brawny, Reginald reaching his orgasm took centerstage for everyone’s attention. I could feel him spasming and his cock pulsing out his goo inside my stretched ass. I felt like we all took a deep, collective breath when this had finally happened, and Regs softening member was slipping out of me – his seed gushing out after it.

I lacked the energy to do anything but slump into a heap on the blanket. This did not seem lost on Dad. “I think my little nympho needs her rest now”, he stated, as he picked me up and carried me to our tent, while bidding good night to his friends. As I slipped down under my unzipped my sleeping bag, warm semen was still trickling out from my hole. I couldn’t be bothered to even try to care enough to find something to wipe it away with. Drifting off into sleep almost instantly, I could feel how Daddy crept close and started to spoon me after he had blackened the lantern and closed the tent. His thing was prodding into my butt. Without any apparent hesitation he slid into my hole yet again. Sort of annoyed at this point, as I seemingly had been on the verge on entering the blessed realm of the Sandman, I was instead being kept awake by the thrusting coming from behind.

I moved my upper body away from him to escape his hot breathing on my neck. Thinking that he could have my ass, but my head needed rest, I arched my back and nudged my butt against his groin. As if in mutiny against my plans of trying to sleep even though I was being mounted from the side, my body was sending ever stronger signals of enjoyment and that this was something to be a part of – something to delight in. Seemingly waiting for me to notice it, my boyhood was stiff, almost aching to be noticed. When I started to yank on it with one hand, Dad had apparently detected this, as he reveled in this new development. His low, rumbling moans became mixed with whisperings about how good I was, how nice I felt, and so on and so forth.

What I suppose could have been perceived as gently, somewhat carefully exploring me with his dong, had turned into something more lascivious. Fueled by Daddy being inside of me, being one with me, I was overcome by passion and felt myself unrelentingly getting driven towards climaxing from behind, from inside, while touching myself. I had trouble understanding everything that he was whispering to me. My focus was on meeting his thrusts with my butt and tugging at my prick. Through groans, whimpers, moans and whining, it was all I could do to repeatedly reply “Daddy… yes” to his ecstatic whispering, to acknowledge that he was to keep going at me, keep going back and forth into me.

With toe-twisting and mind-bending ecstasy, I reached the finish line and through significant convulsions of my whole, petite and undeveloped body, I shot several streams from the tip of my boysnake. Not failing to perceive this, my father appeared to relish the realization that he had “fucked his princess ‘til she came”, and with increased alacrity his piece was having even more of my ass than before. Swiftly but forcefully my innards were then filled up with his manjuice.

I awoke the next day with a splitting headache and an equally aching and sore posterior. The sun was high on the sky. My throat was parched and my bladder full to the point of feeling like it was going to burst. Blessedly, Dad had some aspirin brought along which alleviated my discomfort – at least a little bit. My memories were a bit hazy from what had happening during the night. Oh, I knew that I had had sex – but the details seemed foggy. I could also remember being awoken during the night and early hours of the morning, from someone being on top of me; being inside of me. Flashes and vague memories came crawling back of how I had been intimate with all the men there. Had that really happened? My hurting body told me that it had.

Eating a late brunch, during which my head felt momentarily better, the atmosphere was strange.

No longer doubting that they had seen me naked, and vice versa, and that they had all been with me, I could not help but to feel nervous, self-conscious and awkward. It felt like what had happened, had happened to someone else. Reginald didn’t exactly make it better by incessantly asking if I was “okay?”.

I was still so very tired, and just slept outside on a blanket, face shaded by a baseball cap, until everything had been packed up and we were ready to journey home. During the walk back, I was dragging my feet all way it seemed like. Lee wanted to “have some fun” along the footpath before we reached the hiking trail – which would take us back to the parked car – but Dad insisted that I’d be allowed to recuperate. This did not, however, stop Daddy from encouraging me to please him with my mouth as we came home and showered properly for the first time in a week – this time together, as would become customary for us thereafter.

When that first, more than a little awkward, evening at home came to an end, Dad wanted me to spend the night in his bedroom. Somewhat apprehensive, as my posterior was still very, very tender, I submitted to his will. I did not say anything as he undressed me completely, and then himself, his phallus swaying up and down with his movements as he moved around the bed.

Atop the cupboard in his room, there was a framed picture of Mom. “D-dad, should… should we really?”, I asked in a low voice. “This isn’t… right? Is it?”. Following my gaze, he saw what I had been looking at, and went over to fold Mom’s smiling face downwards. Back in the bed, on his knees beside my naked, thin frame, he said “We decide ourselves what we wanna do. Now… I want you. Don’t you… want Daddy?”.

I was nervous but sort of enticed. It was so strange – absolutely and totally weird, yes – but I was interested in making Dad feel good, in seeing him come, in doing forbidden things. Moreover, I was becoming excited in the prospect of coming myself as Dad’s hands were touching me. Answering him, I nodded and shyly said “yeah”. My horny and inquisitive side prevailed over the nervous and scared one, and I was soon reciprocating Daddy’s intimate caresses. “Don’t you worry, I’m gonna let your perfect bum rest… Not about to ruin my hot… prom queen”, he said. “If you ever need anything… you know you can just ask Daddy”.

“Like… like a new computer?”, I wondered, minute hands grasping his dong. Though I, at that time, had my mind set on playing less online games – something did not really pan out later – I figured that fewer hours spent gaming on a better PC would be worth more in terms of quality spare time. “Of course we’ll get you a new one if that’s what you want”, he answered as he turned off the light on the bedside table.

These forbidden and perverted carnal activities did not stop – they became a daily thing – and through incessantly being fucked by daddy – and also his friends every now and then – I knew I was more of a girl than a boy. I was, and still am, a slutty, little whore and that is that. Nothing wrong with it. We are who we are. I could be liked, desired and loved for what I looked like and who I was, or rather: who I became.

My own bed became a mere token; an unused relic from earlier, boring and worrying days of trying to fit in amongst my peers and friends who didn’t appreciate me. It needed to remain though, of course, in case we had visits – which we ever so rarely had – and most of these were gentlemen callers, first and foremost Lee and Regs, who shared in our greatest of secrets. To the outside, if no one watched us closely, which I don’t believe anyone on our street did, it probably looked like we had continued to live a normal middle-class life, a small and timid-looking boy and his widowed father.

Doing CrossFit with Lee became a regular thing for Dad, who managed to shed many of his excess pounds, whereas I settled with a StairMaster that Daddy bought for me. We placed it in the living room so that I could watch television while I toned my posterior almost every day. I always got compliments for my ass by the men in my life, and I worked out and ate healthy to keep it that way. They wanted me petite and skinny, as I had always been – but that did not mean I could not exercise my touchy. In order to show it off properly, my attire at home quickly became skirts and panties. I never did gain any real weight, and that had quickly stopped being a goal of mine. As for friends, I did not feel like I needed any my own age. I got all the companionship I needed from older, mature men. More than that, I got their undivided attention and love. A perverted love, for sure, but as long as they yearned for me, I had a purpose for getting up in the morning.